Breathe through Anxiety

Hmmmmm....So a few years back I had major anxiety and depression. Can I say that as of right now I am all better...I mean it has been almost 6 years since being diagnosed...but sadly the answer is a big fat NO!

Some people think that it is not an actual occurence can I tell you now that it sure is. For people who have never had anxiety so severe that you think you may be having a heart attack, or can't seem to stop crying and dont know why, you may think it is all in the persons head and all it takes is a little bit of breathing. Let me tell you it isn't always so simple.

Cause sometimes I don't even know what has me in an anxiety frenzy. As a perfect example my cousin had never had a anxiety type panic attack before so when she started having an elevated heart rate, trouble breathing, and chest pain she really thought she was having a heart attack. She ended up going to the ER because she had never experienced something like that before.

I personally don't really know what all of my triggers are but I do know that sometimes I can pin point what is causing it and I think through the situation and reinforce that what is causing me to panic and have anxiety is something that I can overcome. However if I have no idea where it is coming from all I can do is let it simmer or go to my psychologist for some couch time where I have to really reason out where it is stemming from and how to cut off the flow of anxiety that is happening.

It is the can't seem toformulate a thought outside of my mind yet my mind is jumping to and fro, and to and fro. Running in circles that I can't even comprehend. Heart pounding feeling like it is about to claw its way right out of my chest. Throat flexing and closing off. Air is feeling really thin like there ain't enough around for me to get to. Tears coming to my eyes for no apparent reason other than I am having a panic attack and can't control it.

I seek out a quiet place to put my head down, let the tears fall, and breath as loud and a long as I need. Sometimes a sharp object to bleed the panic out to let it flow from my arm, sholuder, thigh, ankles, or any other 3easy access surface. Until I can think again, breathe again, and live again.

Anxiety isn't a joke for those that have it. Anxiety isn't always easy for those who have it to explain and those that don't to really understand what it is and how much it really does affect people.

I keep on struggling a day at a time, sometime a minute at a time until I can breathe again...

illusyon

Eternal Kiss of Darkness

So folks this book here - "Eternal Kiss of Darkness" - is the second installment in the Night Huntress World Series by Jeaniene Frost which is a spin off series from the Night Huntress series. If you are a fan of the Night Huntress series; my question to you is how can you not want to read about the surrounding characters? Cause I sure as hell do.

I myself am a huge fan of Cat & Bones and their sesries so I goobled up the Night Huntress World books like they were going to go out of style quick.

The "Eternal Kiss of Darkness's" hero and heroine are Mencheres (Bones' grandsire and Co-Ruler of their line) and Kira Graceling (private investigator with instincts that are a sure thing). When Mencheres loses some of his legacy powers -- visions, and his personal person location gps -- he believes he is on his way out of this world. He makes a good showing of suicide via ghoul but it turns out that he can't see himself sacrificing the human women brave enough to step in to save a stranger.

Kira has her own life going on but instanly even as a captive in a golden cage feels in expicably drawn to her tall, dark, and hella hot host. She doesn't know why, but she is fighting a bad case of stockholm syndrome.

This book has a lot of character depth and growth. Mencheres stays true to what I saw him as in the Night Huntress series - the all powerful guy who does for other but doesn't believe he derserves due to guilt for past actions. Kira is a strong companion which surprises Mencheres at every turn.

For those fans who hold there breath for glimpses of Cat and Bones you will be happy that they do apprear in a few scenes in this books. More so than in the first one. The relationshp and struggles of these chracters are what to me makes this book worth reading. I am beyond glad that Mencheres got his book and a chance to get his girl.

Love the world that surronds them and I have to say that there were suprises for me in this book it isn't always the case with some books or authors. Another great stop on my literary adventures.

Can't wait for "This Side of the Grave" by Jeaniene Frost - the 5th book in the Night Huntress Series with a tentative release date of February 22, 2011 according to Ms. Frost's office website http://www.jeanienefrost.com/.

Until next time I'm wishing you many great reads and many new authors to add to your very own literary adventure.

Live, Love, & Laugh...while reading.

illusyon